i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out
Then you can skip the embarrassing can I date your ex since you're a lesbian now conversation
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
Of course I lose my iPhone but still manage to hold on to the ruler for my dirty teacher costume
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just found a someones bra in what seems to be a mix of pickle juice and vodka in my fridge. Who was over here lately?
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
You said you were going to start drinking less. Drinking 25 small airplane bottle shots do not count.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't think you understand...I'm really good at getting drunk
I accidentally told my mom I broke my drug nail this weekend
Don't try to sleep with work colleagues because he won't be able to get it up and you won't be able to look him in the eye ever again
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
He passed out with his shoes on 20 minutes till midnight, and I didn't have a sharpie so I took the cheese whiz and filled his exposed ass crack.
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
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