Kanye's agent is the only person whose job sucks worse than mine.
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
My boyfriend just sent me flowers. I am now crying at the fact i fucked my fat neighbor. God please help me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
I'm just gonna plan on never getting a bf. everything I touch turns to gay
P.S. It's common courtesy to let the girl your banging know if she's about to walk into the same place your girlfriend is at so she can get her poker face ready
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
Like wrapping my dick in silk, wrapping that in velvet, and putting it in a cloud. A warm, tight, wet cloud.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
It's George Washington's Birthday. Can you not put on some red white and blue and get really drunk for the original Merican??
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
I'm all about clean living these days
You started your day with fried chicken and a bloody
... after you woke up in your own urine
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
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