Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
you really are a gigantic fucking slut.
sidenote: just remembered sarcasm does not translate through text
it's probably a bad thing that i wasn't even offended, huh?
Sometimes I stick my finger in my own ass and pretend it’s a vagina. I think it’s kinda weird. What do you think?
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
Just went through the drive thru and got 18 free donuts in exchange for half a joint. Dunkin Donuts at midnight might become a nightly thing for us.
I'm sneaking you alcohol into a hospital. This either says love or "we have a problem"
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
I woke up in confetti... confetti and shame
She gatecrashed the wedding and managed to get an invite to the open bar reception. Lucky bitch
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
I’m on my way to fuck the new hockey player
Ride him like a Zamboni
Randomize
