We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
i keep telling myself in the mirror "get undrunk"
By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've made my dad a martini every night since I was 13.. I got this
You are like a vicious sex animal persistently seeking prey
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know you need to get it together when a frat guy wakes you up and says you need to go to class
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
Do you think showing up at his door with bourbon and chicken is too forward?
Learning to live poor pretty well. Cashed in all the coins in my car for nearly 60 bucks and yelled at a Pizza Hut manager, insisting I have a free pizza credit, until he just gave me a pizza.
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
Fruitcakes are only good for throwing at neo Nazis.
Randomize