The tricky part is not getting sand in any orifices. Or is the plural orifi? Orifi don't, we'll both be unhappy...
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
I totally left my shirt at your house. Also I think I high fived your cactus last night
i may have given a gay guy with a mohawk my number last night that said... "you are straight" omg so glad a whole year til my next birthday... also i hit myself in the face with a car door. nice.
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
Celebrated the veterans I suppose, my mouth tastes of gin and black outs
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
And I might have stolen a bag of Doritos out of Matt's car and hid them in my bag and gave individual chips out to people dancing, trying to convince people they were mini tacos.. Like why Am I allowed to be an adult
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
i'm not sure what happened last night.. i do remember the police calling me to find out where i was because apparently at some point i went missing? don't worry though. they found me
I woke up on the floor with 2 cartons of cigarettes, a box of chocolate bars, and a business card for a man named Larry. Don't remember him, but if the Rols on his card is his, I might throw him a mouth party...
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
getting my period the day i moved was my bodies way of saying 'congratulations youre not leaving town with anybodies babies!'
Randomize
