hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
i upgraded from drunk texts to drunk e-mails...real world here i come
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
I'm impressed you managed to decipher 'annslqllpprebBcncnj' into 'I'm drunk at the Vic, come pick me up and do me on the kitchen table'
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
I ate shit on a rock, and when I got up this car full of people asked me if I was okay, and I just sprinted away screaming "I am a banana!"
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
Wait... why were you finger painting at one in the morning?
It's 2 am on the long weekend and what am I doing? Sitting alone in my room eating chips and queso and watching Rio. Fuck I need to get laid.
And I broke things off with Justin last night. Except I texted him while he was asleep and then I was like well, that's probably not what he wants to wake up to, so I sent him a picture of the coconut I microwaved and caught on fire when I was really high one time.
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
I cam home to find him twitching on the floor, surrounded by unopened condoms and covered in cranberry sauce (yes I tasted it) while Thundercats was playing.
Randomize
