Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
I pretended to be blind and he pretended to be my assistant and long story short, we had to buy that bra and panty set, and now we're both banned from Victoria's Secret AND I have a cum stained demi cup.
idk i was trying to watch Fuller House and you got up out of a dead sleep, just in your boxers, said "no more Dave Coulier" and walked out to the living room and unplugged the router
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
Randomize
