I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
At a Jewish lesbian wedding. I stick out like a sore, uncircumcised penis.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yeah, I said "hi, I'm the creepy old guy at the college bar" and she said that she like mature men, wasn't expecting that line to work
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
Can someone please explain where the fish in the mason jar came from when we were at a bar all night?
You told the bartender if he gave you one of the fish you'd go away
I'm still drunk. I put on workout clothes this morning and just puked in my bathroom. That's the same as going to the gym, right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just had sex with the megalodon show on in the background and it was just as magical as it sounds
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
That moment when you're in a room with 3 guys and know how big their dicks are. Then you are married to the one with the smallest dick.
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
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