just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
Is it wrong in Austin to talk to the homeless while I feed a bird my chips??
He ate me out. IN THE MORNING. I love less attractive men.
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
You asked me if you had to go downstairs to get upstairs. And then you forgot where you were.
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
He was telling me how he was trying to grow up. And then 2 minutes later, he told me he was tripping on lsd for the first time.
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
I'd give anything to be driving a pirate ship wearing nothing but a coconut bra and a grass skirt eating a pizza and watching dolphins jump in the waves. Dreams ya gotta have dreams
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
Guess it's not a good idea to try lighting a cigarette with my stove drunk, I burnt off half my bangs.
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
Randomize
