So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
woman puking in liquor store parking lot at 9:30 on a tuesday morning = best commute ever.
Walked into the bar with my burrito and ordered a round of shots for everyone. Not sure if I want to look at the credit card statement.
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
You know you're a heffer when you discover chocolate frosting on your smoking apparatus
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
He ran out to tell us that somebody flooded the bathroom, then went back in there fell on his ass and asked why the floor was wet
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
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