I wiped a tear off her cheek with my boner. It cheered her up
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
He ran headfirst into the atm. Thenasmed us what our spirit animals were...he said his was either a dolphin or a cabbage
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
Seriously? You DON'T remember putting all those Swedish fish in the waffle iron b/c you wanted "One big Swedish fish?" That waffle iron was a wedding gift.
I can't remember much from that party after we snapchatted my dancing boobs to all of her contacts
It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
Randomize
