2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
That's a really weird place to spoon. Especially if there are more accessible places to spoon. Like a bathtub.
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Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
I think the multiple Sunday morning sirens outside my window are a plot by the cops to get back at me for the shit we pulled last night. Or I should move to a better area.
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
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The cop let me finish my J before he cuffed me. Coolest arresting officer ever.
She asked if i could guess "what shape her carpet was". I got it wrong (christmas tree).
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
I accidently sent a dick pic to the group chat with her family. Right after they all said it was a pleasure having me for dinner. Wana drink with me?
11:30 you texted me saying he was on his way. 11:37 you said, "Oh my God that was terrible."
Pretty sure if we keep hanging out on Tuesdays there will be no whiskey left for the younger generations or the universe will implode....tomato tahmato
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