she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
I was looking at some smoking pipes on amazon the other day and realized that work people could look at my history and do a drug test. So I immediately started looking at Sherlock Holmes hats.
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
seriously, i am too high for the omelet station to be playing Being For The Benefit Of Mr Kite at 7am
Do you think she hates me because I thought her roommate's name actually was Butterface?
Someone is gonna learn how to start an IV in the morning
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
Shit. We're going to have to drink until they're cute
Hello cirrhosis
It was my little brother's 14th birthday today. Didn't know what to get him so I just showed him how to use incognito tabs on google chrome.
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
Fucked her on the patio while some dude drove by on a mower. He waved. Twice.
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
Randomize
