I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
Definitely need to find a less healthy bootycalls. All this bitch got in her fridge is feta, English muffins and wheat grass. What the fuck can I make with that???
Found 2 Coors, problem solved.
We had car sex in the parking lot of the dispensery while he blasted Tony Bennett. It was so fucking romantic.
Marshall is naming all the elements of my face. I love science nerds.
he told me "apparently my gag reflex doesn't work so if you magically grew a penis I would deep throat you"
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
Hold me and let me compliment your butt
Woke up in a fanny pack with a bag of cocaine on my cheek
Randomize
