I need to shower the guilt off of my thighs.
Fuck the gym. I just shaved m'cooch and my pants now fit looser.... Dont judge me.
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
Last night I had sex with one of the groomsmen I was in the wedding with. In a stairwell. 13 years my senior. Thinking I should retire from the bridesmaid gig.
I think that's why god made me a woman. Bc it's harder to slap people in the face with a vagina.
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
It's been two dates and she just invited me to her aunts funeral. I can't even. Who the fuck does that? I need to drink I'm coming to get you in 5
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
I'd like to preapologize if you or your mom see me naked at some point this weekend.
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
He's on the porch naked. Help.
Randomize
