You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
After I tried for five minutes to hang my beer from the coat hanger in the bathroom , I have realized I am drunk
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
There are some sad choices of men in the ER. That one was missing teeth. Not the place to find a husband.
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
Pregnancy has ruined porn for me. I can't watch a hot chick get it on without being jealous of her perfectly waxed shit. I can't even see my shit.
Sorry for trying to wake you up by slapping your ass with a fruit 2 go.
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
Your sister walked upto me in the middle of the hallway and was like get us beer or shes never having sex with you ever again, wtf
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
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