First thing she said after sex was.. are you baptised by chance?
He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
You just got cockblocked by Conan O'Brien.
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
We played "race the Jimmy John's driver". Order, then see if we can finish sex before the food arrives.
He tried to make an olympic torch by lighting a corona box on top of a pool cleaner.
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
You fell asleep on the toilet and he was like uh should I take her off?
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
I s2g I’m about to get ghosted by a 34 yr old and my Oedipus complex cannot take it
I gave him a hand job in the parking lot... now he thinks we're meant for each other...
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