hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
First thing I heard on the radio when I got in the car: "humans and dinosaurs used to live happily together"... I need to stop listening to Christian radio...
What do ugly girls do when they get too drunk at parties. They can't pull the whole "sorry i passed out on your couch but i'm hot so it doesn't matter "card
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
Hey babe! Random question. Do you by chance have the pic of my nipples covered with ninja turtles band aids? Thanks.
Remember that cop that blew me in the parking lot a few weeks ago? He's possibly with his wife and kids shopping at Target.
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
Randomize
