My cock was attacked by outdoor plants
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
i got totally wasted at 2pm and cleaned the house bc i was bored. my mom now supports my alcohol problem
They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
You kept excitedly announcing to the bar what time it was. Followed by an equally excited "Clock language still makes sense!"
How does one fall all the way up a flight of stairs? Its hard on me knowing that the survival of our species depends on me not reproducing.
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
I'd like to be surprised that there's a picture of someone pouring champagne in my boobs on Instagram, but I can't.
I wanna snuggle with you as we feed each other chipotle burrito bowls and that's just where I'm at right now
Hey I’m obsessed with Charlie Heaton from stranger things...not because he got caught at the border with coke...okay that’s a lot of it
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
Randomize
