We started making out, then he decided to get naked, put on a condom, and proceed to dry hump my leg, sweat pants and all, until he blew his load. I thought this was college. I immediatly left claiming I can't sleep in other people's rooms. He didn't even bother taking off my hoodie.
so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
I was so high I thought there were pigeons in my room. Long story short there are now donut crumbs all around my bedroom.
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
A baby just go on our party bus. What. The. Fuck.
We woke up, fucked twice, she drank 3 warm heinekins to cure her hangover and said "Im glad you're still hott when im sober"
I woke up spooning my guard tube. Tell me I'm not the most dedicated lifeguard ever
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
Whatever, I used my iphone to send an Escalade to pick up a booty call last week. For free. It is futuristic as fuck out here.
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
I cannot take an uber back in my costume...can you please come get me?
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
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