real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
I'll bet she douches with gravy.
You can't be mad at me for wanting to drink though, it is the reason we're engaged
Guy passed out in the lobby with a keychain sharpie hanging from his belt loop. 1 guest came in and wrote on him, then others saw and got in line. I'm not waking him up.
He offered to take me out to a nice dinner but I told him I would rather he just pay for my beer this weekend
Well, my mom brought up me being vague about losing my license and she gave me the intervention look. so i left before they could bring out their heartfelt letters...
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
Sober Sundays just aren't working out anymore.
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
I think I collapsed a disk in my spine when I drunkenly lifted that fat girl on my shoulders to chicken fight at the pool.
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
I just don't think it's that outlandish to ask that I don't get messages from my husband at 8:30pm on a Wednesday telling me he peed on our cat
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
Randomize
