i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
You puked on my feet last night. You owe me a pedicure.
Bring one of those heart stabber things in case you go into shock. I'll jab you.
Apparently at 2 AM I decided to let the world know about my newfound love for elephants
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
You need to get laid. You spent last night stumbling through the club pulling couples apart and telling them to leave room for Jesus.
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
Should I have spent my entire pay check on Crown Royal and LSD? No. Do I regret it? Also, no.
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
Randomize