he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
the guy working at the drive-thru just asked me if i wanna bang after he gets off work tonight.
given your current drought situation, im genuinely curious to know what your answer was
i told him maybe and gave him my number. sad? probably. but even if the sex is bad maybe i'll get a free burger out of it
They woke me up at 4 in the morning screaming "drunk adventure time!" because they needed a sober chaperone. They made me walk them around the block shoeless.
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
I have invented a new sport: freshman-watching. I'm sitting on our porch literally dying watching the freshmen run around trying to find parties
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
I'd cum for enchiladas.
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
I’m lazy so obviously looking like a rotisserie chicken is my favourite position
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
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