In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
she had that "i just got used" look on her face when i kicked her out at 5am
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
That little tingle vodka gives me in my esphagus is what lets me know I'm still alive.
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
I'm so poor. I just wiped my ass with cocktail napkins... That I stole from the neighbors... When I was over there stealing Cheetos.
I'm also sorry that I ate your chicken sandwich while you were throwing up....
He tried to break dance on the island in the kitchen and ended up knocking over everyone's alcohol onto the floor then yelled "GUCCI" before vomiting
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
Do you ever go take a shit and end up sitting on the toilet for like 45 minutes wondering what the fuck you're doing with your life?
Everyday my friend, everyday.
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
Randomize
