dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
She was so drunk yelling at me in my driveway to fuck her. It was the ghetto version of Romeo and Juliet.
No one even knew you were hurt until we saw the multiple cuts to prove it, and when we asked what happened all you could say was "I fell out"
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Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
I'm standing in the shower drinking with the light off and a candle lit, listening to Amy Winehouse. Be proud.
They're re-releasing Titanic in 3-D. Can I interest you in a joint venture to create the greatest drinking game of all time? I think yes
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
So this 40 year old woman was trying to bring me into the bathroom to blow me and the bartender called the cops on her because she was showing her tits. Only in asbury.
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I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
you literally stared at me for three minutes and then said "hey this tequila isn't gonna drink itself, boss"
Did I, at any point last night, say I was dying?
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
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