Texts From Last Night

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  (734): View more from Michigan

  I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!

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  (734): I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!! http://tfl.nu/dwqd
  Replies (6) Good night (796) Bad night (921)
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  (905): View more from Toronto

  the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.

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  (905): the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest. http://tfl.nu/4jgv
  Replies (30) Good night (1321) Bad night (4215)
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  (573): View more from Missouri

  I thought I broke my iPhone. I was almost as depressed as the day I broke my vibrator.

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  (573): I thought I broke my iPhone. I was almost as depressed as the day I broke my vibrator. http://tfl.nu/5d16
  Replies (31) Good night (1231) Bad night (3949)
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  (860): View more from Connecticut

  Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.

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  (860): Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise. http://tfl.nu/z4y1
  Replies (9) Good night (799) Bad night (4101)
• Favorite

  (419): View more from Ohio

  Can I get a DUI with a shopping cart? I've nearly hit 2 displays and little girl...

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  (419): Can I get a DUI with a shopping cart? I've nearly hit 2 displays and little girl... http://tfl.nu/mv65
  Replies (8) Good night (4314) Bad night (1185)
• Favorite

  (619): View more from California

  Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.

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  (619): Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out. http://tfl.nu/o96t
  Replies (5) Good night (1004) Bad night (3224)
• Favorite

  (310): View more from California

  Your texting shows a blood alcohol level of .12

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  (310): Your texting shows a blood alcohol level of .12 http://tfl.nu/ovmd
  Replies (3) Good night (1551) Bad night (572)
• Favorite

  (312): View more from Illinois

  All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.

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  (312): All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday. http://tfl.nu/9i7k
  Replies (1) Good night (745) Bad night (1144)
• Favorite

  (509): View more from Washington

  Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game

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  (509): Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game http://tfl.nu/0fm6
  Replies (3) Good night (1110) Bad night (736)
• Favorite

  (702): View more from Nevada

  Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?

  (702): View more from Nevada

  Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way

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  (702): Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from? (702): Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way http://tfl.nu/vsyq
  Replies (4) Good night (1773) Bad night (615)
• Favorite

  (925): View more from California

  If you're not peeing in public bi-monthly, you're not really living.

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  (925): If you're not peeing in public bi-monthly, you're not really living. http://tfl.nu/hoy7
  Replies (7) Good night (1030) Bad night (709)
• Favorite

  (515): View more from Iowa

  Girl I love you like I've been drinking all day

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  (515): Girl I love you like I've been drinking all day http://tfl.nu/z36i
  Replies (6) Good night (1174) Bad night (444)
• Favorite

  (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.

  (1-570): View more from Pennsylvania

  As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.

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  (570): If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit. (1-570): As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no. http://tfl.nu/hlm9
  Replies (4) Good night (1354) Bad night (521)
• Favorite

  (908): View more from New Jersey

  Snaps to my Ella Fitzgerald station for such a jazzy walk of shame

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  (908): Snaps to my Ella Fitzgerald station for such a jazzy walk of shame http://tfl.nu/paxg
  Replies (0) Good night (680) Bad night (307)
• Favorite

  (518): View more from New York

  He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.

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  (518): He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band. http://tfl.nu/loy3
  Replies (0) Good night (30) Bad night (6)

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