Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (248): View more from Michigan

  You up for the gym tonight after work?

  (734): View more from Michigan

  I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.

  (248): View more from Michigan

  Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.

  (734): View more from Michigan

  Chris Brown style, or less felonious?

  (248): View more from Michigan

  Haha, all felonious.

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  (248) You up for the gym tonight after work? (734): I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog. (248): Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today. (734): Chris Brown style, or less felonious? (248): Haha, all felonious. http://tfl.nu/kj7p
  Replies (5) Good night (1540) Bad night (598)
• Favorite

  (607): View more from New York

  Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.

  (1-607): View more from New York

  I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.

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  (607): Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom. (1-607): I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts. http://tfl.nu/s0vw
  Replies (15) Good night (2376) Bad night (1243)
• Favorite

  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  I'm watching the red sox through my neighbors window from my bathroom. We're winning btw.

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  (617): I'm watching the red sox through my neighbors window from my bathroom. We're winning btw. http://tfl.nu/9aqz
  Replies (17) Good night (4694) Bad night (982)
• Favorite

  (313): View more from Michigan

  Tidal wave of highness just hit. Find shelter and catnip. gloves. zebra striped car washes.

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  (313): Tidal wave of highness just hit. Find shelter and catnip. gloves. zebra striped car washes. http://tfl.nu/gyak
  Replies (8) Good night (3568) Bad night (1517)
• Favorite

  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar

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  (215): Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar http://tfl.nu/5i2o
  Replies (4) Good night (1211) Bad night (2058)
• Favorite

  (715): View more from Wisconsin

  if I see a bottle of vodka right now I'll probably throw up gum I swallowed when I was a kid

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  (715): if I see a bottle of vodka right now I'll probably throw up gum I swallowed when I was a kid http://tfl.nu/otel
  Replies (8) Good night (1078) Bad night (1133)
• Favorite

  (336): View more from North Carolina

  I'm not sure any amount of coworker judgement will keep me from eating oatmeal with dinosaur eggs.

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  (336): I'm not sure any amount of coworker judgement will keep me from eating oatmeal with dinosaur eggs. http://tfl.nu/p7wi
  Replies (5) Good night (2065) Bad night (459)
• Favorite

  (312): View more from Illinois

  That's the point dumbass, I can't use my boss as a reference cause they'd have to fucking call him in prison.

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  (312): That's the point dumbass, I can't use my boss as a reference cause they'd have to fucking call him in prison. http://tfl.nu/qs9j
  Replies (22) Good night (1508) Bad night (763)
• Favorite

  (608): View more from Wisconsin

  It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes

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  (608): It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes http://tfl.nu/xen4
  Replies (4) Good night (1160) Bad night (475)
• Favorite

  (585): View more from New York

  Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20

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  (585): Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20 http://tfl.nu/5k8j
  Replies (12) Good night (2207) Bad night (500)
• Favorite

  (301): View more from Maryland

  Saved a life and got us a free vacuum cleaner (and learned vacuum is not spelled "vacumn"). Get on my level.

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  (301): Saved a life and got us a free vacuum cleaner (and learned vacuum is not spelled "vacumn"). Get on my level. http://tfl.nu/wvpb
  Replies (3) Good night (1049) Bad night (531)
• Favorite

  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  you were making out with a guy that looked like Fat Albert, I kicked you in the vagina but you didn't stop

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  (610): you were making out with a guy that looked like Fat Albert, I kicked you in the vagina but you didn't stop http://tfl.nu/ld3s
  Replies (7) Good night (620) Bad night (1242)
• Favorite

  (304): View more from West Virginia

  The next time you fuck up, your grandma sees your dick pics

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  (304): The next time you fuck up, your grandma sees your dick pics http://tfl.nu/2xhw
  Replies (5) Good night (427) Bad night (788)
• Favorite

  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  She walked out and announced that he was now part of our confused, incestuous, glorious eskimo family. I've never been more proud.

  (802): View more from Vermont

  Campus is too small for this to keep happening

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  (617): She walked out and announced that he was now part of our confused, incestuous, glorious eskimo family. I've never been more proud. (802): Campus is too small for this to keep happening http://tfl.nu/z6hi
  Replies (1) Good night (640) Bad night (318)
• Favorite

  (585): View more from New York

  don't worry about my dad. he just hates you because you're liberal, not because we're fucking.

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  (585): don't worry about my dad. he just hates you because you're liberal, not because we're fucking. http://tfl.nu/3gr5
  Replies (1) Good night (721) Bad night (181)

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