Texts From Last Night

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  (540): View more from Virginia

  woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft

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  (540): woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft http://tfl.nu/ob1j
  Replies (26) Good night (1013) Bad night (4543)
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  (314): View more from Missouri

  so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.

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  (314): so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for. http://tfl.nu/ue3g
  Replies (16) Good night (4104) Bad night (905)
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  (785): View more from Kansas

  Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.

  (785): View more from Kansas

  I could make treat bags

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  (785): Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson. (785): I could make treat bags http://tfl.nu/dekx
  Replies (104) Good night (6232) Bad night (744)
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  (310): View more from California

  so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?

  (818): View more from California

  by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ

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  (310): so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA? (818): by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ http://tfl.nu/5i2r
  Replies (43) Good night (14108) Bad night (1144)
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  (214): View more from Texas

  Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.

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  (214): Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better. http://tfl.nu/wgom
  Replies (20) Good night (4286) Bad night (1154)
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  (816): View more from Missouri

  is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex

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  (816): is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex http://tfl.nu/zw16
  Replies (7) Good night (4662) Bad night (1111)
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  (515): View more from Iowa

  On your way out, lock the front door. And by lock the front door, I mean find the door handle, reattach it, and then lock it.

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  (515): On your way out, lock the front door. And by lock the front door, I mean find the door handle, reattach it, and then lock it. http://tfl.nu/mvhu
  Replies (12) Good night (6942) Bad night (1186)
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  (513): View more from Ohio

  I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.

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  (513): I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen. http://tfl.nu/9jnz
  Replies (19) Good night (5258) Bad night (949)
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  (405): View more from Oklahoma

  I'm confused about why you felt the need to ask me to buy you life alert for christmas at 3:28 this morning.

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  (405): I'm confused about why you felt the need to ask me to buy you life alert for christmas at 3:28 this morning. http://tfl.nu/v1az
  Replies (9) Good night (3544) Bad night (1399)
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  (804): View more from Virginia

  Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.

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  (804): Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina. http://tfl.nu/ugq6
  Replies (14) Good night (3214) Bad night (1097)
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  (740): View more from Ohio

  his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis

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  (740): his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis http://tfl.nu/cmya
  Replies (5) Good night (873) Bad night (2921)
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  (843): View more from South Carolina

  Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold

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  (843): Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold http://tfl.nu/201i
  Replies (2) Good night (591) Bad night (1522)
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  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  So the name of the kid from the sponsor a child comercial popped into my head while I was masturbating this morning. Needless to say I will now be now be donating out of guilt.

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  (412): So the name of the kid from the sponsor a child comercial popped into my head while I was masturbating this morning. Needless to say I will now be now be donating out of guilt. http://tfl.nu/8gk3
  Replies (2) Good night (447) Bad night (1125)
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  (316): View more from Kansas

  You should be glad you didn't come with last night. I watched pirate porn for the first time in my life as the 9th wheel.

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  (316): You should be glad you didn't come with last night. I watched pirate porn for the first time in my life as the 9th wheel. http://tfl.nu/ugfj
  Replies (3) Good night (301) Bad night (686)
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  (734): View more from Michigan

  I had 17 beers 2 days ago. I'm not dad material yet

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  (734): I had 17 beers 2 days ago. I'm not dad material yet http://tfl.nu/92s9
  Replies (4) Good night (406) Bad night (412)

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