ADVERTISEMENT

• (856): View more from New Jersey

  i hate when i ask a girl what she's being for halloween and the first word isn't "slutty"

  Fav 45 4696 1628

  share tweet
  

• (917): View more from New York City

  Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.

  Fav 26 7786 1423

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (778): View more from British Columbia

  we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever

  Fav 8 4381 1152

  share tweet
  

• (540): View more from Virginia

  just found out i fit into magnum condums. this is going to be the best weekend ever

  Fav 34 7902 1252

  share tweet
  
• 

  21 Of The Most Impressive Things Ever Seen In Porn

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (270): View more from Kentucky

  I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.

  Fav 13 3494 1754

  share tweet
  

• (530): View more from California

  Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.

  (1-530): View more from California

  at least it wasnt animals

  Fav 3 1229 1698

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (512): View more from Texas

  I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see

  Fav 6 1080 748

  share tweet
  

• (408): View more from California

  Omg I'm puking right now and then sneezed four times in a row. You don't know pain til this happens to you.

  Fav 7 634 1256

  share tweet
  

• (303): View more from Colorado

  I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER

  Fav 0 193 144

  share tweet
  
• 

  19 Parents Had Epic Reactions When Catching Their Kids Being “Bad”

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (360): View more from Washington

  You're a goddess. Probably of destruction and dick jokes, or some shit, but man, lesser bitches wish they could be half as fab.

  Fav 0 431 143

  share tweet
  

• (360): View more from Washington

  You need to be on (or possibly create) the international emoji committee to address all of these glaring oversights

  Fav 0 246 179

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (832): View more from Houston, Texas

  Also you know what's irritating? When the guy you're sleeping with refuses to like any of your Instagram posts

  Fav 0 204 237

  share tweet
  

• (734): View more from Michigan

  THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.

  Fav 0 181 73

  share tweet
  

• (256): View more from Alabama

  I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life

  Fav 1 32 19

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (551): View more from New Jersey

  you are the root of all my greats nights and my worsts decisions

  Fav 1 76 7

  share tweet
  

Randomize