Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(405): View more from Oklahoma

I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY

(614): View more from Ohio

handstands? WTF?

(405): View more from Oklahoma

she was a gymnast

(614): View more from Ohio

go to hell.

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(405): I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY (614): handstands? WTF? (405): she was a gymnast (614): go to hell. http://tfl.nu/pyfe

Replies (9) Good night (3020) Bad night (643)
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(720): View more from Colorado

Girl last night got so wet when I was going on down her it flooded up my nose. I nearly drown

(303): View more from Colorado

I'm at my inlaws playing Scrabble. Go Fuck Yourself.

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(720): Girl last night got so wet when I was going on down her it flooded up my nose. I nearly drown (303): I'm at my inlaws playing Scrabble. Go Fuck Yourself. http://tfl.nu/zmkv

Replies (44) Good night (8637) Bad night (1094)
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(386): View more from Florida

First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.

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(386): First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook. http://tfl.nu/2gux

Replies (12) Good night (5044) Bad night (551)
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(774): View more from Massachusetts

What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling

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(774): What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling http://tfl.nu/ijkr

Replies (21) Good night (1042) Bad night (6106)
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(908): View more from New Jersey

I will never get the visual of you crying while chewing christmas lights out of my head

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(908): I will never get the visual of you crying while chewing christmas lights out of my head http://tfl.nu/52vv

Replies (12) Good night (4885) Bad night (1660)
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(850): View more from Florida

She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.

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(850): She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed. http://tfl.nu/7kwk

Replies (10) Good night (3213) Bad night (872)
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(815): View more from Illinois

Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest

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(815): Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest http://tfl.nu/qjdf

Replies (12) Good night (4458) Bad night (770)
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(651): View more from Minnesota

I just saw a dude sitting IN a bush, weeping and playing a harmonica. I hope your day is going better than his.

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(651): I just saw a dude sitting IN a bush, weeping and playing a harmonica. I hope your day is going better than his. http://tfl.nu/2lgm

Replies (15) Good night (2555) Bad night (792)
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(217): View more from Illinois

I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?

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(217): I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high? http://tfl.nu/4i2m

Replies (23) Good night (2842) Bad night (701)
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(608): View more from Wisconsin

I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.

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(608): I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs. http://tfl.nu/xnbx

Replies (9) Good night (1486) Bad night (542)
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(413): View more from Massachusetts

How was the picnic?

(516): View more from New York

We played softball, except our team sucked. In one hand was a mitt, the other a beer.

(413): View more from Massachusetts

Why didn't you put them down?

(516): View more from New York

No beer left behind.

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(413): How was the picnic? (516): We played softball, except our team sucked. In one hand was a mitt, the other a beer. (413): Why didn't you put them down? (516): No beer left behind. http://tfl.nu/j969

Replies (1) Good night (965) Bad night (337)
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(828): View more from North Carolina

There are days when you go to throw something in your bedroom trash can and realize the only things in there are a used condom, a Lime-arita can and a muffin wrapper.

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(828): There are days when you go to throw something in your bedroom trash can and realize the only things in there are a used condom, a Lime-arita can and a muffin wrapper. http://tfl.nu/4caj

Replies (2) Good night (618) Bad night (310)
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(+44): View more from United Kingdom

Also, I called my liver hardcore in front of vet students last night and then wound up having three of them trying to palpate it. So...not saying that again.

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(+44): Also, I called my liver hardcore in front of vet students last night and then wound up having three of them trying to palpate it. So...not saying that again. http://tfl.nu/5f8v

Replies (2) Good night (262) Bad night (510)
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(708): View more from Illinois

I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway

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(708): I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway http://tfl.nu/ggq6

Replies (1) Good night (806) Bad night (324)
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(503): View more from Oregon

I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK

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(503): I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK http://tfl.nu/p76p

Replies (2) Good night (274) Bad night (586)

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