People in love make me want to vomit
I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
Dude, it's gettin so bad even my fantasies just wanna be friends.
dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
Cuz last time you told me I was going to be shocked about something you got a hand job from a stripper in canada
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
Can we just get drunk and watch the Birdcage please I have no tolerance for straight men today
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
Drunk level: ugly crying in the bar upon discovery of sweet tarts and not smarties.
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
why is half of my head shaved?
Randomize
