I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
Rule #1. Nothing comes between you and fantasy sports. Not even a hot chick willing to give you a blow job
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
She's gonna be fat in the future. On a side note I had a "It's not you, it's me." conversation with a bottle of jack last night.
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again
We got to the hotel at 12AM with nothing but a plastic bag of magnum condoms and lube, while wearing glow sticks. The receptionist handed us a bunch of water bottles and said "These are on us.", not even phased by three dudes about to have a threesome. I love this town.
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
I was cock-blocked by a swat team last night.
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
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