i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
good news: I made it out of bed and into shower. Bad news: I made it back to bed without clothes. Worse news: I don't know this bed.
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
N I'm drinking this invention I call "do-it-fluid" I had a bottle of vodka that was 3/4th empty, so I put in 1/4th rum, 1/4th tequila, 1/4th whisky... it's definitely the worst idea ever..
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
Is her dick bigger than yours?
Why can't you just come over, fuck me, then leave so i can get stoned and watch law and order?
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
I swear I'm an adult. I say as I send my mom to go find me green lucky charms and lady gaga oreos
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