I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
She woke up laying on my kitchen floor, ketchup bottle as her pillow, in front of my fridge.
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
He talked to you for like two seconds while you were shit faced doing Forest Gump impressions...how is that possible?
Dude, double fisting packs of Ramen saved my life last night
I'm pretty sure that our Lady and The Tramp Red Vine moment was the farthest I got last night
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
I think every girl deserves a pregnancy scare. Because then it just feels like such a priviledge to be bleeding out of the vagina.
I legit just did a jig towards my box of tampons.
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