i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
how in the hell can u get pulled over when ur car is parked.
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
the lady next to me just sniffed my hair, smiled, and then fell asleep. I almost started crying from that kind of creepiness
don't cry, we can learn from her
I flashed a party boat full of Asians yesterday, didn't I?
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
If I have to give a UPS guy a lap dance, you owe me a drink.
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
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