return my video game
I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
Last night did I take a piece of pizza out of your hand and then proceed to eat it?
Twice...
I just got a lap dance from a sexy cop in return for giving him his sunglasses back. I think this is going to be the beginning of a really great friendship
Trust me, dating 38 and 20 year old dudes at the same time is the best. Money plus all of the sex. Finally figured out this relationship thing.
Apparently I give handjobs in my sleep. So that's interesting.
I can't remember the last time I saw a penis in person that I didn't see a million times on text first
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
Whoever put the life size cut out of Snoop Dog next to me in bed understands me.
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
Dude I left his house at 5:30 a.m. after you peed on his front door and then tried to fight me for my blanket. Don't even do that at my house or I will end you.
hahahahaha. Worst. Text. Ever.
Randomize
