Taylor Swift is so right about you.
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
i must of done something right to please the booty call gods. . . maybe fucking that fat chick?
When the cops knocked on the door, he just knocked back and announced "house keeping"
I mean, how many people can say they helped surgically remove something from their body? Other than the guy that got his hand stuck under a rock and cut it off. Doesn't count
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
Exactly. This is the bit where I learn a heartwarming lesson about not making my drinks half vodka
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
They don't even know who I am but they just woke me up with maracas and invited my boobs to a kegger
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
After returning from the hospital with lock-jaw from getting tackle at the game. Some naked chick busted out of his room and hit him with a devastating haymaker to the jaw because he wouldn't have sex
Randomize
