There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
Midget Michael Jackson impersonator dancing to Beat it in Penn Station almost caused me to miss my train. God, I
our cab driver is having phone sex.
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
if you were to get worldwide popularity from playing guitar with a plastic yellow bat while drunk on YouTube, would you hate me?
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
Tried to eat a sandwich this morning. Couldn't. My jaw is locked up. These marathon blow jobs are killing me
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
I accidentally lit my hair on fire and we broke the bed. How was your night?
Almost caused a huge accident on the highway because I was distracted by how orange the road barrels were
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
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