Hey sorry for feelin' up your date. Sadly, this is a mass txt.
North Korea, Best Korea!
I'm drinking in the hospital parking lot.
You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
I decided it would be a good time to smoke on one of my deliveries but then I got the munchies and ate a piece of the pizza I was freaking out so I told him it was our new pacman pizza
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
Can we please get through at least one night out when you DON'T threaten to have sex with one of my parents?!?!
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
Also I just took the BEST ass selfie of my adult life.... it's gonna be a good day haha
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