I hate when my naked walk-arounds are interrupted by someone knocking on the door
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
My halloween constume SCREAMS "Hey i just got done with a shitty relationship and I'm DTF"
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
Every girl my sister has brought home from college I've had sex with, check and mate motherfucker
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
There's a potato with a bite taken out of it in the kitchen
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
Randomize
