i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
I wish I was there to have sex with you on the plane to lessen your anxiety.
That's the nicest thing anyone has over said to you.
Crowning achievement. I bought ranch dressing and emergency contraception.
I'm about to have a bowl of Advils... without any fucking milk.
Was looking through my phone and saw that drunk me took a tit pic in the Denny's bathroom..
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
Someone wrote "LazerSwords" on my cock last night. My erect cock. Tequila is no one's friend.
I bought him flowers and fake vampire fangs, cuz there's really not a greeting card that says "Sorry I got wasted last night and started a very sloppy bloodletting ritual.".
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
Just when I thought we may have our first low-key night together, I sang an Aladdin karaoke song to a bunch of roller derby girls, you took shots with married women, and we both fell asleep in our offices.
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