she sounds like chewbacca in bed
My professor just gave everyone in the class extra credit... except for the kid wearing the Cubs hat
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
She set an alarm on my phone for her birthday. Place: Her bed.
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
The girls danced. I drank. Then I danced cause I was drunk. Then I ripped tim's shirt off cause I'm awesome.
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
Glad I can drunkenly remember to not get tomatoes on my Mexican pizza but can't tell a guy to keep his hands off my ass
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
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