Why would I want to inherit a sex machine used by my grandma?
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
Do you have any idea how horrifying it is to hear your sister and her husband fucking then immediately go down stairs only to hear your parents fucking....... I wish I was Hellen Keller right now.
Jake bring pizza.
JAKE BRING PIZZA.
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
Dude you spoke to a girl about CRICKET. She MUST want sex
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
Apparently when cookies are around I think of myself as a puppy and reward myself for everything #WhoIsAGoodBoy
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
Remember that pair of super cute shorts I pooped in? I miss those 😔
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