His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
It's shit like that that makes me wish being deaf was contagious
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
I CAN'T DO THIS MUCH FABULOUS BEFORE LUNCHTIME
It's hard to judge what a reasonable amount of cereal looks like in the spaghetti pot. We're out of cap'n crunch and milk.
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
Also, can next Friday be Long Underwear Friday instead of Jockstrap Friday? Because I'm about to cough up a testicle.
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
Its weird to introduce me to his wife and kids on the first date, right?
He woke up wondering who broke in and rearranged all the furniture. He reviewed 11 hours of security footage before I told him he did it while whiskey-drunk.
Randomize