u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
Gym doesn't open till 11. I'm sure that of the other four people waiting in the lobby, I'm the only one still drunk and only going to the gym to shower.
I'm going to but the new Playboy with Chelsea Handler on the cover. I'm pretty sure it's the only time buying a Playboy will make me gayer...
I woke up around 30 bottles of beer, with a piece of aluminum foil in my hand, that had "you Win" Wrote in sharpie..
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
Almost ran over girl selling candy bars for charity. Pretty much obligated to buy at that point.
I picked up the bartender so he could open the bar early and ended up with him giving me a ride home when he closed. I like snowdays and everything, but they get really expensive. Also, I think I threw up on his front door. Not checking.
So, last night I fell asleep sitting Indian-style on the floor, propped up against the front of the couch with an empty wine bottle in between my legs... How was your night?
You tried to steal my pants at 3am saying they were yours and somebody was gonna die, not cool dude
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
wow bdsm is so cute
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