sitting with a guy who's looking at the cum stains on the bed. Do you think he's convinced it's from the cat?
No. He thinks you're slutty.
Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
did all my christmas shopping this morning at 4am drunk. never went to sleep. i was walking home drunk last night when i passed a target and saw 3 kids having a dance off. had to join. somehow they convinced me to go shoopping with them. i bought 4 disco balls and a lava lamp.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The movie was so bad she gave me two blowjobs. Two.
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
Either im tripping real hard, or there's a legit land shark in my apartment.
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
Celebrated the veterans I suppose, my mouth tastes of gin and black outs
I'm drunk in a place called Lick-A-Chick. PS. It's not a lesbian hot spot, they sell chicken.
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
I should've left when he told me that he only smoked crack by accident once
Randomize