It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
At what point did you think the cops were actually coming to hang out with us
You cant hold me accountable for my actions when im high.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I literally just wiped coffee off of the corner of my mouth with my boob because my hands were full. Thought youd be proud. Good morning!
Yesterday was just the icing on the rejection cake that was my week
We're using joints as your birthday candles
I woke up with a stapler in my ass. Don't even complain to me.
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just told the joker that my vagina is the bat cave and he needs to infiltrate it.
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
Googled 'how drunk am I' and it was NOT helpful
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
I apparently sent an offer letter to, and then subsequently onboarded, the wrong candidate. How's your Monday?
Randomize