she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
You were high and telling me you felt like Pinocchio and that fire was bad for wood.
Just shook hands with the bud light truck driver, thanked him for his service to our country
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
foreskin is a definite game changer
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
Just had to kick my 26 yr old boyfriend out of my bed before getting the kids up for school. Have I mentioned being 41 doesn't suck as much as all the hype.
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
If you find me in the bathroom in a fetal position, licking frozen bacon .. I might have Drank a little too much.
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