yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
Writing a book: The Evolution of the Douche Bag: From Popped Collars to Ed Hardy Shirts. Doing research now.
Make sure you include chapters on white sunglasses, spray tans, and toxic amounts of hair gel.
Give me a few hours to remember what being sober feels like.
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
i finally decided to cut him off after he he looked me dead in the eyes and said "how have i been inside you for the past twenty minutes when my pants are still on?"
which one of you assholes put my new jeans down the garbage disposal?!
Are you really surprised she can't remember? That's like 50 people. I couldn't rattle off all 50 state capitols off the top of my head, you're bound to forget a few here and there
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
You rolled onto your side and told me 'this is the recovery position'. That was after you were stoned. You've done this way too much.
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
He just showed up at my house with a giant box of Trojans and a 6-pack of Yoohoo "for a special treat afterwards". I'm in love.
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
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