Sometimes your consistent use of proper punctuation makes me nervous D:
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
No I'm not proud of you for not sleeping with him. He has herpes. You don't get a gold star for behaving how you're expected to. Trust me. I'm a teacher.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
If you don't sing me a lullaby then I'll just take shots till I pass out
I'm mentally preparing myself to hang out with him by staring into the mirror saying "thou shalt not get naked" over and over.
Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt?
Is that a question you really want to ask or do you just want to tell you that I can't walk without feeling like my legs are collapsing underneath me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up while eating peanut butter from a jar. I don't think I should be social today.
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
So you're at your daughter's volleyball game looking at dicks online? That's amazing.
No, I was picking her up from volleyball and sitting in my car looking at dicks.
i'm sitting in bed scratching my boobs and wearing a sparkly fedora and have no one to blame but myself
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
Randomize