i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
Drunk in a bar in Texas. The 24 y/o hottie I am chatting up just called me a male cougar. I am dealing with this whole turning 40 thing juuuust fine.
Just got caught pissing on a plant in her room while she was in the shower first word out of my mouth were my bad
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
Housekeeping just called to see if we were okay bc they came in the room earlier and we didn't move.
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
Im pretty sure my housekeeper high fived her on the way out this morning
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
National tequila day this year falls on a Monday. I've never been more disappointed in my life.
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