so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
I'm holding in my pee so that I can hear "Cowboy" in its entirety on the radio
My low point of the night was when my roommate spit out her jello shot and i took it...
I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he told me I talked like a deaf person
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
I drunkenly transformed into shehulk last night and lifted every single guy off the ground bc one guy told me that there was no way I was strong enough. Don't worry, I proved them wrong. Stupid stereotypical men.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going as either a recovering alcoholic, or as a guy who came to the party straight from work. Too literal?
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
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