yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
I swear a good massage is the easiest way in my pants.
Not that there's a hard way... but you know what I mean.
I hope, cuz I was gunna get "celebritory drunk" but now I have to get "I'm disappointed drunk"
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
Whatever. He's going to tie me up tonight whether he wants to or not.
i think when the guy sitting in the corner singing tells you you're too drunk, you're too drunk.
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
How do I say “I have great tits” without it sounding awful
She was talking about how a garden gnome was hitting on her the whole night. We thought she was just that high, but turned out the gnome was that guy in the weird hat.
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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