My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
After she threw up on my floor she started singing "this is why I'm hot."
She's allergic to latex.
Lucky bastard.
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
some girl just asked me if I was that guy that hooked up with nine girls in one night. officially a local celebrity. gonna try and autograph her boobs.
Mom just posted ur drunk pix from Cancun in the newly made "My not-so-fantastic son" album. Thought you should know.
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
I just watched the lion king for the first time in years. It's like the equivalent of a really good blow job.
It's a strange mix of shame and pride every time I pee at the bar and still see my lipstick on the bathroom wall...
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
I think I'm gunna glue a sign to my head that says "WAKE ME UP BEFORE 7!" And go to sleep and hope a kind passer by wakes me up for my exam .
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
Randomize
